PMR result

I felt very stupid and usless...this afternoon after work I when to school to take my PMR result.

my result...
B.M D
B.I C
Math C
SCIENCE D
SEJARAH C
Geo D
K.H D
B.C E

I try to get all C's but I just cant get it.I try study hard but I still cant get the good result that I wish that I cloud get. my mum scolded me and said "my friends son can get all A's why can't you get it?" I have nothing to say and I just keep quiet and walk up to my room and started to type my problem.

Sometimes i feel like killing myself some day but it is not the right way to do it. Some of my friends say "you can do it Melvin" but i donno why i just can't.

I love to study but i just cant remember a lot and about 2 week i will forgot what i learn.I am so tried about study a lot but i just can't stop because this is not the time to let me stop studing.So now holiday i try to work hard and get some extra money for myself and i also got give some money to my daddy and mummy...I think...hmm... never mind